The Problem

is mostly that I have a lot of to say. While also being at a loss for words. Thoughts and feelings go hand in hand. Whatever you’re thinking manifests in your emotions and in turn, actual surroundings.

Yet explain to me how you move past the worry? Every fucking book aimed at 20-something year olds wasting their lives, as I am mine, simply states to do.

 To just do. To wake up and do it and they all add that you may not be able to. Well no shit. I never finished college and in the 4 years since I last set foot in one I have not been able to save up the couple of thousand dollars it would cost for me to return. Which means I’ll be closer to thirty when and if I ever do graduate.
 I only add this because sometimes I think if I would’ve just went to college maybe I’d be on my course now. A big ‘eh’ to that though. I know lots of people whom graduated that are as lost in their lives as I am now.

So “just chart a fucking plan and set goals and stop being lazy” right? Well you obviously have never experienced real life or ever survived the bottom of the pit of your life. If you had you’d laugh at that notion understanding there is no planning this circus. No one listens and we all do what we want and there are sad endings. Sad endings we don’t like to think about like dying alone in a pool of your own human excrement. Or adjusting quietly to a dead end 9 to 5. Retiring without ever working a day in your life towards your own future, but instead daily for a company’s.

Let’s not even get into how this all add or subtracts from that other vital part of ourselves called erm… love? If everything I’m doing builds me and either attracts or reflects like minded or similar people; then I am royally fucked.

Fuck you Ryan O’Donnolly and your book about an age group you’ve already exited and found success off of by talking about. So if I write about an age where I did nothing, from another age where I am writing about doing nothing and am successful; of course I know what I’m talking about right?

-A

Tumblr really has to be the most artistic public forum for self validation and neurosis. I absolutely love you all. You all are so detrimental to my mental health but I truly feel at home here. Thank you.